I write about parenting quite a bit here on this blog. Sometimes the moments I write about are gloriously inspiring; sometimes they are terribly embarrassing. What you don’t get in my posts is an audio file of the joyful noise that fills our home throughout the day. It’s the joyful noise that can sometimes include crying, yelling, whining, complaining, and arguing. If your home is filled with joyful (and sometime non-joyful) clamor, you, too, likely spend many an hour praying, preaching to your own heart, applying self control, venting to your spouse…and reading parenting books.
Give Them Grace: Dazzling Your Kids with the Love of Jesus
girds the parent with the paradigm and the vocabulary for grace-filled, Gospel-centered parenting. As parents, we are encouraged to think of our children’s spiritual condition as it relates to their behavior, leading our children to see themselves as they truly are: sinners in need of God’s grace.
At the deepest level of what we do as parents, we should hear the heartbeat of a loving, grace-giving Father who freely adopts rebels and transforms them into loving sons and daughters. If this is not the message that your children hear from you, if the message that you send them on a daily basis is about being good so that you won’t be disappointed, then the gospel needs to transform your parenting, too. (pg. 21)
One of the things I love most about Elyse Fitzpatrick’s books is that she regularly follows the pattern we find in the Apostle Paul’s letters by beginning with the declarative (the truth about who we are and what we believe), followed by the imperative (what we do in response to what we know). Give Them Grace
is no different. After clearly explaining the Foundations of Grace in our parenting paradigm, the second half of the book is dedicated to applying these truths as we seek the Evidences of Grace in our children’s lives.
My conclusion? With such deliberate consideration of the gospel, the Word of God, the finished work of the Cross, and the freedom we have from the Law…it’s not just my kids that are being dazzled with the love of Jesus. I am reminded once again that, when I am overwhelmed by the sufficiency of the Cross, my parenting will emanate from a heart that applies what it believes. A disciple responding in love, not to legalism or self-righeousness: the very thing we long for in our children.
I was so blessed to receive a copy of Give Them Grace
To enter, leave a comment on this post telling me what you hope to glean from this book. Entries for this giveaway will end at 10pm on Sunday night, May 29th, 2011. Winner will be announced on Monday, May 30th.
Blessings to each of you!
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(Giveaway now closed.)
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I hope to learn how to better and more effectively direct my child to a relationship with Jesus Christ.
At this stage in parenting, I am daily more and more aware of how much #1 is watching and listening, and I have begun to see more signs of willful disobedience mixed in with all his sweetness and obedience. I am daily more aware of my own sinfulness and need for grace and I struggle to know how to communicate to the boys my lifeline in Christ as we go about our day… I’m currently reading Shephearding a Childs Heart which has been both encouraging and challenging. I would love to glean what wisdom is offered in Give Then Grace as I aim to communicate and demonstrate the grace of God in my family!
As much as I’d love to read this book, I will gain yet another book that I’d like to read in my already too high pile of books. What I thought I would tell you is that I truly enjoy reading your posts, and often wonder how in the world you find the time to write so well about so many things. God has truly gifted you and I am amazed at how well you use your gift. I enjoy the encouragement that I often read here.
I have twin girls turning three in about a month. This stage is hilarious, exhausting, cute, and also very difficult due to their age along with some other difficult trials we are going through including health issues and financial hardship. It really is so easy to revert to shame, mommy/daddy pleasing, and fear in the moment and then later realize that is not the Gospel at all! I very much would love to learn [and need to learn] more about how to communicate the Gospel to them on a regular basis more effectively and learn how to become more grace oriented in a way that is attractive and would help draw them to Christ.
This sounds like something I need very much! Adding another little one to the mix of our family has been challenging in ways I never even thought of. Grace has not been found often in my desire to help big brother to understand that little sister is not ready to wrestle and does not always want to be smothered with kisses, snuggles, hugs, and constant loves. I assumed I would be helping to direct negative attention away from little sister, not positive! I would love to read this book to have an outside perspective – which always leads to change on my part!
How wonderful! I would love to read this as my husband & I keep discussing ways to show our daughters Jesus & His amazing love for us in our everyday situations. I am continually reminded of Gods grace in my life & would love to be able to communicate that better to our girls! Thanks Ruth!
I’d love my parenting to transcend beyond “keeping the rules” and learn how to model my love and discipline after God’s care as my heavenly Father.
This book has much to tell me about raising children God’s way. I’d really like to read this book and apply the truths in my own reality.
I hope to gain a better understanding of what grace filled parenting looks like. I am a biblical counselor who is single and sometimes counsel mothers who are in need of wisdom that this book offers. It would be a blessing to myself and many! I have most of Elyse’s other books and know this would be just as beneficial in my growth and learning!
I hope to learn how t o discipline my two boys from a calm, assured, Christian motivation that they can carry into the rest of their lives instead of from frustration, anger, and law-filled demands/commands… without heart.
Convicting just to type this. Boo!
I think it’s very easy as parents to get wrapped up in discipline and forget the grace (or to take grace to mean permissiveness). You’ve introduced me to Elyse Fitzpatrick and I truly enjoy her Biblical view on this. I’d love add this book to the top of my “books to read” stack.
This sounds GREAT! Greg and I have seen so early on how wicked and sinful even a precious little baby can be and at 18 months now, she does deliberately disobey and do things behind our backs. We want to point her towards Christ and the cross, but we need all the help we can get. It’s much easier said than done!
What I hope from this book is to be a better parent while extending grace. My son is turning 10 and will be a teenager soon. Every though I am a youth pastor and know how to relate to teens, raising them is another challenge.
My husband and I are expecting our first child in October and have been eagerly awaiting the release of this sweet book. What we hope the Lord works in us through this book is a deeper understanding of the Gospel and it’s application to our everyday life. We are convinced that the more we understand and believe His glorious Gospel, the more we will have a grace-centered life, marriage, and soon, the more we will raise our children in the fear of the Lord. We would love to win a free copy!
I want to teach my boys to love Jesus more than anything else in their lives, while disciplining and instructing them in a God-honoring way.
“A disciple responding in love, not to legalism or self-righeousness: the very thing we long for in our children.”
THIS, THIS, THIS!!! I have three little ones now and find I have been beating them over the head with the law and not extending to them the grace that has been given to me. I desperately need to read this book.
More than anything, I want my daughters to know the deep love of our Lord, and the power of the Gospel to change their hearts and lives. As a Mommy who is daily reminded of my own need of grace, I plan on reading this book asap and would love to receive a free copy!
I need help in relating (disciplining, loving, interacting) with my children in a way that draws them to Christ and reveals the gospel rather than imparting fear and driving them toward performance. I know this isn’t a “how to” book but Elyse Fitzpatrick is my favorite author so I can’t wait to see what she has to say about gospel-centered parenting.
I am seeing first hand how my son is a little sponge and he’s soaking up the good as well as the bad. I want to pour more good into his life. I am painfully aware how lacking I am and my shortcomings as a mother…but I pray for grace every day…that is the only thing that sustains me some days. I hope this book will impart wisdom so I may teach grace and kindness to my son (and any subsequent children)…but also that I may be gracious and loving towards myself instead of harsh, critical & giving the Enemy a foothold.
I get so busy with life. The days pass quickly with school, activities and church. Sometimes we get so busy rushing from here to there, we miss each other. There are days when I am physically present with my children, but not always engaged in where they are in life. My quest lately is to really see my kids through the eyes of my Savior. To stop and study my children, to appreciate them and seek God’s plan for their lives. I hope to learn practical ways the author was able to show grace to her children and how that impacted their lives so that I can also use those strategies with my own children.
This book sounds amazing! It’s totally where I’m at in parenting right now, trying to see my children and myself as sinners in need of grace. It’s so easy to fall back on “obey me” with my children, but really what does that teach them of the gospel or Jesus? I want to see me children as my Savior sees them and love them the way He loves me.
This book spoke to me straight from the title. I am the beneficiary of grace always and forever, yet I fail to give my children grace in the big and in the small on a daily basis. I need to learn how to do this for my children as Christ has done it for me. I would love this book as I have read some of Elyse’s other books and gleaned much from them. In fact, this sounds like the perfect book for a bible study in the fall with my circle of friends. Thank you for reviewing it here.
I’m studying to become a nouthetic counselor through NANC and hope to learn more about parenting with grace so that I can encourage other mothers.
My children are grown and I have 10 grandchildren. Oh, how I wish I had heard this message when my children were home. But, since older women are commanded in Titus 2 to teach the younger women I am hopeful because I have a second chance to share what I’m learning with not only my grown children and grands but also other women.
The free book would be a wonderful blessing. My husband is disabled and unable to work so money is tight.
I’ll be happy though for anyone who wins the book. May God’s grace be exalted!
Georgene
I love reading books on gospel-centered parenting. I am particularly convicted in the area of requirering behavior modification from my children without bringing the gospel to them. I hope the Holy Spirit would use this book to help me bring Christ to my children on a daily {hourly…continual} basis. Thank you so much for sharing!
Love it when people truly understand what Jesus did for us. I work in Children’s ministry would love to win this book. The gospel is all about what Jesus did, not what we do.
I’m a new parent – and am always up for advice on raising my child(ren) with a God-centered heart. This book sounds wonderful and I would really love to read it!
I would just love to read it! The book sounds like the kind of lovely exhortation that would sweep through and bring an array of insights…I’d welcome them
I’d love to hear how she extends grace.. practical application is right up my alley.
David and I read Grace-based Parenting by Tim Kimmel and really appreciated his thoughts on the subject. I’d love to read even more, especially if there are some ideas about applying these themes to a toddler…
Why am I crying right now?! haha, besides being pregnant and hormonal, I think it’s because it’s hitting me that I’m a steward of a human life and have the responsibility and privilege to be the one (with my hubby) to point my child to Christ from the get go. How I long to be that kind of parent and allow God to prepare my heart for the journey of gospel-centered motherhood! You inspired me to read Elyse and she is now one of my all-time-faves
I am deeply touched as I am reading all the voices from the hearts of all these precious young men and young women who have a strong desire to seek the guidance from our Lord Jesus Christ as they learn to be a godly parent or parent-to-be.
And you, my dearest daughter, though now being a beautiful godly young mother already, how much more beautiful you would have been then, if I, your mother, had a good Christian mentor and had been more mature in Christ when I was raising you. Nevertheless, I praise the Lord for my life and for your life. I am so thankful that God has been using you as a godly young mentor or inspirer for many other young couples. Mama is truely poroud of you. Ai Ni!
I want to be dazzled too! At times I have lost that spark. If I want my kids to be dazzles, and I really, really do, then they need to see that their mom is overwhelmed but our Great God!
Thank you for this opportunity to win this new book! I need to make sure what I teach my children through my actions is consistent with my faith in Christ. When I unintentionally withhold grace when I am stressed or tired, what message am I teaching my children? I so need a refresher course on grace!
Anything that encourages me to make grace a theme in my parenting is welcomed. I want to know how to better show Jesus to my children by showing them grace.
guessing i might be 27 minutes late. but not in california? ha. i’m dying to glean some grace in my parenting. some grace that will OCCUR to me before i expect too much. sheesh.
Bummer, Amy! I had already selected the winner and scheduled the post! Good reminder, next time I need to put the time zone (duh)! You can borrow my copy when I’m done!