A dear new friend asked to come observe one of my homeschool days, since she too schools several older children with toddlers and infants at her feet.
I will be honest; I was a little more than anxious about it.
I know what my home days are like. (You may remember, we are part of a Classical UMS school, so the kids are at home every other day…) I know how loud the crying can get, how chaotic it can feel, how destroyed my house ends up looking, how frazzled I can be, how much disciplining I may have to do, how impatient I often feel, how disorganized I wish I wasn’t, and how discouraged some days can leave me…
…And my friend wanted to come observe my homeschool day.
I was fully aware that she knows loud. She knows correction and discipline. She knows disorganization. She knows mess. She has seven kids under 11…she knows.
But, there’s something about inviting another into your own messy, imperfect, frustrating, noisy, challenging world that can be a homeschool day. The home day prior to her coming was one of those days. It proved LONG and arduous, with shedding of tears by most, and hours of of clean up following. How would she possibly benefit from seeing how not well I do it all?
But God moves in mysterious ways. He is always at work in our weaknesses to show His great faithfulness.
Simply put, here’s what I learned:
1) We should always train our children as if someone was observing us. Because, Someone always is.
While there is no way we could’ve “faked” a compellingly easy homeschool day, we did experience a smoother, more encouraging day of school. Here are some reasons why:
- I got dressed in real clothes–as for a job–and showed up to my day of homeschooling, treating the work ahead with great value.
- I spoke clearly and directly to my children, and lowered my voice. I focused on edifying speech, and threw out the wasted words of complaining.
- I proactively encouraged.
- I didn’t check email or complete housework. My kids had my full attention.
2) Our imperfect chaos, shortcomings, and striving for excellence IS encouraging to others.
Instead of cubicles and orderly checklists, my friend observed an organic family structure at the kitchen table, taking turns with mom, taking turns playing with the baby, taking turns stretching the limbs of the mind in the ebb and flow of a self-paced school day. She graciously shared that seeing my infant scatter toys throughout the house was beautiful. That all the messiness of my life was encouraging. Amen to God making loveliness of all that we want to sweep under the rug.
Praise God we are meant to live in community– as mothers, as homeschooling families, as Christians.
Transparency and honest hospitality may be the very vessel in which God encourages another while transforming your pride in humbling sanctification. So, go ahead…you have nothing to be afraid of, nothing to hide.
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Hear, hear! In the classroom, I felt I taught my best when my superiors were observing. More alert, more engaged, everything. Praying right now for that truth to lodge in my heart: that Someone is always observing; even though I’m not officially “homeschooling” yet.
Great encouragement! Thank you, Ruth!
Such a simple truth, right? That we do have an audience of One everyday of our lives, and yet, sometimes we don’t strive and put worth and value to our daily efforts as if He is our guest of honor. Thanks for commenting, Sara. I always love hearing from you!
I am so blessed to read this. Thank you. I am a mother of 4.
11, 9, 3 & 1. My two older ones finish this term in 2 weeks as school going kids since age 5 and I am about to take the first step of homeschooling!!!!! I need ALL the encouragement I can find. I know its the right thing. Just so anxious about all the responsibility and chaos.??!!
Responsibility and chaos…yes, those are absolutely weighty bi-products of educating in the home; however, you will soon find that the freeing joy of getting to be your child’s primary influence, and the chaos that requires greater diligence and dependence on the Lord, is fully worth it and fully provided for. Praying you will be greatly encouraged in this new journey!
LOVE this! I have thought the same things, especially everything in your first point. God is always watching and He’s the only one who matters! I’ve often said that if we SAHM’s would treat our “jobs” like a job and do all the things you mentioned in your bullets, our days would run more smoothly and we’d be able to get a lot more done. I, too, have been making a conscious effort to do this…especially the getting dressed in real clothes part. It is so tempting to wear sweatpants, or even jeans and a t-shirt with no make up and a pony tail all day. However, I find that I feel more motivated and productive if I actually get dressed as if I were really going somewhere.
BLessings to you!
Thank you for writing this encouraging post. I have been experiencing “being watched” for the past few months. Since our move to Africa we have hired a local to help me around the house. She doesn’t speak English though so can’t understand my words that I speak to my children, she can only hear my tone… this was a huge wake-up call for me. I realize I am not accountable to her, but I do want to be a godly example to her, and when I thought about my tone, and what I sound like… it was frightening!
Getting dressed and having my hair and face done is definitely key for me to feel like I can take on my day in a productive manner! Plus, if we have to zip out someplace, I’m already ready to go!
Blessings.
So encouraging Ruth! Thank you! As I am still struggling for balance on “home days” these reminders are all so helpful.
I enjoyed reading this. Transparancy is so freeing. Thanks for being real and reminding me that reality is so encouraging. Bless you Ruth!