I get to regularly comfort and console people who freak out on my behalf.
…the folks who practically faint when they hear I have five BOYS and would go back for round 6.
Then, there are the ever-sweet people who pronounce me a saint, a mother who has a “special” crown waiting for me in heaven, as consolation for such a tough but honorable mission in motherhood.
I have a couple of thoughts about that.
It’s not that I don’t appreciate the empathy for the work in raising boys. I do. And, yes, it’s a lot of work.
It’s not that there haven’t been sacrifices that we’ve made in order to raise a large family. There have.
It’s not that different dynamics don’t exist in a family like ours that may not be present in a family of boys and girls. There are.
But, here’s what I always come back to whenever someone is tempted to elevate my family or my circumstances in motherhood:
Each person is called to the exact portion that the Lord has seen fit to give him/her. Each person’s portion has equal potential to sanctify, stretch, and ultimately bring glory to God.
God’s desire is for his children to worship Him, to proclaim Him, to fall completely upon His mercy and find Him sufficient for EVERYTHING. He draws us to this purpose, sometimes through singleness, sometimes through inability to have children, sometimes through loss of children, sometimes through adoption, sometimes through a small family, sometimes through a large one.
So, don’t be tempted to think that someone is a mightier mom or a Christian superstar on account of their blessings, their trials, or their circumstances. Your seemingly uneventful life may victoriously proclaim God’s greatness just as another’s seemingly intense set of circumstances can do the same. Your portion may be hard, your portion may be challenging, or your portion may be exactly what you hoped for, but regardless, your portion is God’s goodness at work in your life…His portion for you has a purpose.
I’m embracing my portion, and I’m simply handing over my messy pile of inabilities and worthlessness to the One who is all worthy and all able. He’s making me into a more joyful worshiper day by day, through the portion He gives me from His hand. I’m praying you will receive what He has for you and what He’s doing through you this day. It’s all for our good.
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Sounds like a lot of people appreciate you and want you to know even if it comes out awkwardly. Your words beautifully point point them to the reason – Christ. (A reminder that seems especially fitting for homeschool moms. I sometimes feel our ‘community’ makes this an issue.) Thank you for sharing!
Thanks, Laura–I agree,and don’t want to make light of the fact that others are kind and try to encourage me with their sentiments. I’m so grateful for the encouragement of others!
Thank you for this post. We’re expecting our 6th (4th boy) in a few weeks, and I become weary of the incredulity and pity from others. WE ARE BLESSED. No more so than someone with fewer, or no, children. But children aren’t a burden from God. We aren’t waiting, desperately counting the days until our house is empty. I suppose I need to ask for more grace for the careless comments of others.
Congratulations on your 6th! You are blessed. Praise the Lord for your great perpective on the blessing of children…what a great gift to share with others!
We have 4 children ages 5 and under, and it is always challenging to find something gracious to say in response to some of the pitying, condescending, amazed, and even downright rude comments we’ve received! I really appreciated your post about how THIS family that we have is the exact right portion that God has given each of us for both our blessing and our sanctification.
Thanks for the comment, Katya. I think we all agree that it IS hard work and we DO feel overwhelmed at times, but we have such an opportunity to encourage others with how the Lord grows us and gives us joy in the midst of the challenge and blessing of motherhood!
love. and now I must tend to my portion.
Thank you, friend. I can’t wait to hear more about your portion….and how you manage seven.
I too have five blessings boy (8), girl (6), boy (4) and twins almost (3). If you aren’t a math-alete that is 5 kids in 51/2 years. I receive comments all the time mostly “you’re crazy” and “I don’t know how you do it, I couldn’t” most of the time I just smile and think “this is my portion, what God has given me, not you so don’t worry”.
I am called only to walk my own walk, but I also remember to walk a mile in others shoes (before I open my mouth).
I sure do love boys they are so great. I am so glad I have a daughter.
I so agree, Abby….we never know what experiences another’s coming with, and how they may not have experienced joy in motherhood, themselves. We have such a great opportunity to encourage others with our testimony of joy and gladness. (I personally have so much to continue to work on here!::) )
Whatever my lot, thou has taught me to say, “it is well, it is well with my soul.”
I always perk up when the words lot or portion are used. Sandra McCracken has a song In Feast or Fallow that uses this chorus (I love it!):
In the harvest feast or the fallow ground,
My certain hope is in Jesus found
My lot, my cup, my portion sure
Whatever comes, we shall endure
Whatever comes, we shall endure
I wrote a post a couple of years ago on my 3mhighway blog about the lot (or portion) my aunt had for over 20 years of suffering from cancer until her final breath. The point of the post was to celebrate the fact that her portion was good. And the good may still yet to be seen.
Now that is perhaps a little different than the point you’re making her as it relates to children, but not in terms of your main subject, “His portion is always good!” because His portion is The Christ.
May I always say “it is well with my soul” to all of my portions!
Amen, friend! I completely meant for this post to relate more than simply within the context of children. I’m so glad you shared your family’s journey in embracing God’s sovereignty and goodness. Can’t wait to see you next week!
i was SO encouraged by this!! i have 3 kiddos, 3 years old and under. sheesh. just saying that makes me tired!! haha…i was SO not one of those women who wanted to be a wife and mother. i was totally fine being a single Jesus loving gypsy. BUT, God had other plans. coming from a small family who are not followers of Jesus, i can sometimes fall into the trap of feeling sorry for myself…like when I’m so overwhelmed, etc. I long for this perspective to be engraved on my heart…to fully embrace that His portion is always GOOD. motherhood has brought me to my knees more than any other time in my life…i’m forever grateful He meets me right where i am. thanks again for this post!! i so love coming to your blog during the kids nap times